Deshaan Johnson is a men’s work coach. His company, Socially Agile, is dedicated to improving and empowering the lives of men. Deshaan has a great YouTube channel by the name Socially Agile where he discusses many topics that are near and dear to me such as the power of presence, being intentional in life, growth, grounding oneself with integrity, and he did a video with Soma Miller about our topic today which is the benefits of mentorship. So go check out Deshaan on YouTube!
Episode 27 – How to Bounce Back when the World Knocks You Down – with Frank Ferrante
As the subject of the documentary MAY I BE FRANK?, Mr. Frank Ferrante, opened his heart in a courageous and vulnerable way. The ending has inspired thousands of people to face their own demons. Frank himself was inspired to become a spokesperson for personal transformation and weight loss.
Frank experienced the struggles of losing weight, and succeeded by taking a holistic perspective. His new mindset inspired Frank, to speak about the power of transformation, that rests in all of us. Today he shares what he’s learned since the success of the movie in 2010.
Synopsis of “May I Be Frank”
Frank Ferrante is 54. He weighs 290lbs. Frank’s had a lifetime of drug & alcohol abuse and as a result contracted Hepatitis-C. He’s on multiple medications including anti-depressants, undergoing chemo and drinks 10 espressos a day to stay awake.
One day Frank stumbles into Cafe Gratitude, a Raw food café in San Francisco. The cafe’s manager. Ryland asks Frank, what is one thing you’d like to do before you die? Frank answers ‘I want to fall in love one more time, but with a body like this, no one will love me, because i don’t love myself.’ Watch as Ryland, his brother Cary and best friend Conor, help Frank take on his weight, health, relationships and loving himself in just 42 days!
Frank Ferrante quotes
“I am not an expert nor do I have the answer. I have witnessed the indisputable fact that we are all connected. What we do can and will make a difference.”
“I have learned that the three most important things a man can say are: I don’t know.Would you please help me? I love you.”
“What happens when Tony Soprano meets Deepak Chopra? That’s how people have described my story. I might throw some Woody Allen in there and a dash of Hunter S. Thompson.”
Diet, diet book, May I Be Frank, Weight Loss, Losing weight, Transformation, Coaching, Courage
Episode 26 of Happy and Healthy Over 40: Understanding Neurofeedback with John Mekrut. This is a conversation with leading Neurofeedback expert, John Mekrut. We discuss the human brain, getting older, training your brain through Neurofeedback – and bees!
John Mekrut’s Bio
Mister Mekrut is the owner of The Balanced Brain Neurofeedback Training Center which specializes in training the brain in self-regulation for maximum performance. He is the father of two teenage girls. One of his daughters is on the autistic spectrum. Neurofeedback training helped her improve her self-regulation and stop taking medications. It was a wonderful transformation and set her on a path of success in school and life.
His experience with his daughter, led John to train at the Othmer Institute in Woodland Hills, California. John trained with Sue and Siegfried Othmer. They are two pioneers in Neurofeedback training.
“I keep myself informed about the latest developments in neuroscience, attend professional development courses and am always looking to add elements of mind/body work to my practice. Since the brain does not work in a vacuum, I encourage proper nutrition, sleep habits, and behavioral changes that will aid in the work of properly re-regulating a disregulated brain.”
John’s decade long experience with biofeedback and Neurofeedback technologies has made him a recognized leader in his field. He is the President of the Western Association of Biofeedback and Neuroscience. It is the oldest professional organization for biofeedback professionals and for the second year in a row.
John is also included in the TransTech 200 as one of the two hundred thought leaders promoting the use of technology for mental, physical and spiritual wellness. John Mekrut is a sought after speaker in a variety of venues. He maintains a robust clinical practice serving clients from toddlers to senior citizens.
What are some applications for Neurofeedback?
John Mekrut utilizes state of the art technologies, which provide direct awareness of the brain’s own signaling. Neurofeedback teaches the brain to build new neural pathways and increase blood flow to specific regions that need it, physically rewiring your brain to transform the way you think, feel, and experience the world. It is taught to re calibrate its behavior and promote stability and flexibility of response.
The clinical applications go back over 30 years. The applications include improving the symptoms of complex and developmental trauma. Some of the issues addressed are: ASD, ADHD, ODD, anxiety/depression disorders and many more. The holistic nature of the training complements and augments any other interventions that may comprise a treatment plan.
This led to Mr. Mekrut’s association with Hope Psychiatry, where integrated modalities are the cornerstone of long-term recovery. John is a valued member of the team, and his work is part of the integrative effort to improve the lives of the growing community.
The podcast, “Embracing Your Strength – Masculine and Feminine Power with Julie Fernandez”, is a conversation that came about on a sunny Southern California afternoon. Julie is my yoga teacher. We also share a love for Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Often times, our conversations center on exercise and strength training.
As we sipped mint tea, on the rear patio of La Maida Institute, the topic shifted to our vulnerabilities. It was a surprise to learn that Julie wasn’t always so confident and self-assured. Like many of us, Julie imagined that she was not meeting her own expectations.
Julie had a hard time accepting her physical strength as an asset. She considered it unfeminine. She felt it was a masculine trait. Anytime someone would complement her on how strong she was, Julie would cringe. Her idea of female beauty was a dainty, petite girly girl. Julie didn’t see herself in the corporatized slick advertising in the media.
This is her story of continuing evolution, and growth. She now understands that her beauty flows from her strength. How did she learn this lesson? Listen to the podcast!
I had a great time doing this one. Julie’s journey of greater understanding of masculine and feminine power and her own self acceptance, is inspiring, and informative.
Hector: This is episode 25 of happy and healthy over 40, the website and podcast for people over 40, where we discuss Health, sex, mindset, lifestyle, and relationships – as we enter our forties and Beyond. Whether you want to maintain your vitality, grow your competitive Spirit, or you want to keep a clear mind and a powerful body. Maybe you just want to feel healthy. You’ve come to the right place you may not be 21 years old anymore but you can feel like a million bucks.
On this episode of the show we’re going to be speaking with Julie Fernandez Julie is a trauma therapist and operations manager for La Maida Institute – a holistic Wellness Center here in North Hollywood California. She’s also a yoga instructor and program manager for Exhale to Inhale. Julie’s been on the show once before and it’s a real pleasure to have her back! Julie is also my yoga instructor. She’s helping me improve my flexibility and Joint strength so that I can continue to do Brazilian jiu-jitsu. She’s also Brazilian jiu-jitsu practitioners as well.
Our topic today is embracing your strengths and masculine and feminine power welcome Julie!
Julie: thank you thank you, nice to be back
Hector: Right on. We’ve had a couple of interesting conversations recently. We got into the topic of embracing your strength it started out as a conversation about martial arts and feeling strong and embracing that power. The power that you feel. It evolved into this conversation about embracing our power.
You and I both didn’t want to accept our own power. The way that you are powerful – the way that it came across to me was that you didn’t want to acknowledge that power. You’re finally acknowledging that. Please let the listeners know about that.
“I didn’t want to be seen as weak.”
Julie: it’s been a journey we talked about that it stems back from childhood. I’m a Survivor of a lot of abuse, a lot of sexual and physical abuse. In many cases my power was taken away I always felt really weak and in order for me to keep going I had to be tough. I wanted to do away with all the girly stuff.
I didn’t want people to see me as weak. Because, I had to be strong cuz I had to protect myself. It’s really helpful to have that and then as I got older.
As I grew into a woman, I also wanted to be seen as feminine so then I had to let go of that strong Persona or so I thought and whenever somebody would mention that I was strong physically. I remember having such a negative reaction to it and got to be seen as a strong woman. It’s just that whole dynamic is really hard for me to accept that I am strong I wanted to be seen as a beautiful woman it was hard for me to accept both – to be seen as both.
“…feeling my strength… it was really healing for me.”
The last few years I started getting into weight training, and I started tapping into my strength even my trainers and some of the people I train with would always comment that I feel so strong. I don’t want to be and I am actually really strong – physically strong.
It was something to see myself get stronger and stronger each time lifting heavier and heavier weights. this is me learning to accept that what would it be like for me to use that in different ways and that’s when I started to get into Jiu Jitsu and seeing and feeling my strength in that way it was really really healing for me for me.
Learn more by listening to the podcast…
Episode 25: Sexual Empowerment Over 40 with Celeste Hirschman. Some of our deepest pain is related to sex and personal relationships. Sexual empowerment over 40 with Celeste Hirschman, is an open conversation about feeling loved and held instead of abandoned and disconnected. It gets easier to be sexually empowered after the age of 40. Advertising and media are not marketing to you as heavily. This frees you up to live the life you always wanted. That includes great sex!
About Celeste Hirschman
Celeste Hirschman received her Master’s Degree in Human Sexuality Studies from San Francisco State University. Ms. Hirshman taught as a lecturer at San Francisco State University (SFSU) in the Human Sexuality Studies Department and was a Project Manager at SFSU’s Center for Research on Gender and Sexuality, where she co-authored numerous articles on adolescent sexual development. She is the Co-founder and the Co-creator of the Somatica Method ® and trains coaches in the method. Celeste also has her own private practice where she sees clients in her San Francisco office.
Somatica’s Mission Statement
Our Mission is to fill the world with love, erotic pleasure, connection, satisfying relationships, and self-aware people who feel free to fully express themselves and can support others in doing the same.
April 8th 2018 is when the next Introduction to Somatica Core Training. The program begins on the 26th of April. Enrollment is open until the 25th of April.
What does it mean to be “happy”? The Domains of well-being and happiness is a great episode if you’ve every asked yourself, “Why am I not happy?” or if anyone has asked you, “What would make you happy?”. Some of us have forgotten the answer to this question for ourselves.
Dr. Jeffrey Jessum, and I discuss the nature of happiness after 40. Jeffrey E. Jessum is a clinical psychologist and long-time practitioner of Mindfulness Meditation. He received his Bachelor’s degree in psychology from UCLA and his Master’s and Ph.D. in clinical psychology from the California School of Psychology.
What is Happiness?
“Happiness is the relief after extreme tension.” ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald
There are two definitions to this question. One definition is emotional happiness. This type of happiness is the pleasant sensations in the body that we experience, when we’re rewarded with something. We feel this type of happiness in childhood, when mommy gives us a cookie, for being a good boy.
The second definition is the domains of well-being. Dr. Jessum says there are four domains of well-being. The first is our relationship to ourselves. It’s the subjective way in which we see the world. The second domain is how we see others.
Dr. Jessum talks a lot in this podcast about the third domain. This is all about our physical health, and vitality. Jeffrey models this aspect well in his personal life. He is very physically active and is a long time advocate of meditation. Exercising outdoors instead of at the gym, always improves my own mood. Try it! In my opinion, this aspect of well-being and happiness is the one that is easiest to understand for most people. Many have a hard time communicating with others, but everyone can understand why a hike in the mountains can make you happy.
The fourth is our understanding of the physical environment around us. This one can be a tough one for some. Living or working in a dangerous environment, can be a contributing factor, to potential unhappiness. Children growing up in a broken home, where violence is an almost daily occurrence, contributes to their unhappiness. Although, even a poor environment may not effect some people. We’re all wired a little differently from one another.
Can you learn to be happy?
“We don’t even ask happiness, just a little less pain.” ~ Charles Bukowski
Some men, over 40, have forgotten what it means to be happy, because we spend so much of our time trying to make others feel happy. Our bosses, wives, and children always come first. When is there time for us. Dr. Jessum and I discuss this as well. It’s more than possible to be happy. It’s essential!
Working with a coach or therapist is a good way to get a handle on your own personal domains of well-being and happiness. Dr. Jessum’s website has a lot of tips for you to check into on the topic. You can contact him at the website, if you want to work with him. You can always contact me here with any and all questions or comments.
Keywords; domains of well-being, coaching happiness, well-being healthy care, integral, integral psychotherapy, wellness, employee well-being, happiness, mental happiness